it seems like a lot of ppl are talking bout results day.
i mean, ppl start blogging bout it.
(so here i am doing the same thing..)
rahhh.
i feel so 'unsettled'.
i dunno how to put it.
i choose to not think bout it.
tt day tws told me his fren said tt mayb it would be end of feb,
i was thinking NOOOOOO....
please.
knowing my results a day earlier would mean a less day of carefree day.
rahhhh.
let it come out in march bahh.
okay, i noe i've got to face it sooner or later.
i searched my archive.
i went back to 2007 feb.
to recall how i felt bout results day.
n there was only 2 posts in feb.
n only one was closely related to how i felt.
n it was the day whn our results were released.
oh well.
seems like the impact A's brought is so much greater than O's.
it's stressful to even think of how i'd do.
sometimes i asked myself wad i hoped to get.
and den i really tot about how i tot i did.
n it was scary.
i asked myself how would i react if i didnt get any As.
or if i didnt do v well for my sciences.
rahhhhh...
i dun wan to think about it anymore.
im afraid to know my results.
just like i was afraid to get back my math prelim papers.
i lost all faith in myself at tt point...
someone save me...

i dreamt of results day a few times.
once was bout my results.
another time was tt i forgot to collect it;
yes i totally forgot.
n somehow yk called me n i found out he did VERY well.
hahaha.
n there i was panicking bcoz i just woke up whn ppl alrd got their results slip.
wad a nitemare.
n the last time was about how i did for gp.
scary isnt it.

okay lah, but wadever it is i guess i'l just see if i did well enough to get into some course tt i wan.
otherwise i'l just take something else.
hv i any other choice?
=(((

BOO!
i accepted another assignment and these goes my free day.
pay is not tt fantastic (well, i dun even noe wad i shld be getting so i just accept blindly =.=)
okay, i was (or am i still considering?) thinking of seeing how this new assignment is n mayb if they're quite nice to me i'll ditch the p6 boy.
he's really stubborn.
n he's not afraid of me >.<
eh. mayb i dun nid him to be afraid of me but at least listen to wad i say!!!!
n follow it! >.<
rahhh.
sometimes i really couldnt be bothered n just watched him do wad he insisted on doing.
BOO!
he loves arguing man.
sucks.
i feel like just going off whn he doesnt listen.
even his grandma cant handle him =.="

okay, i hvnt got over the fact tt i hv no more free day.
tt's sad.
mon 3.30 to 4.30.
tues 3.30 to 6.30.
wed 3 to 5.
thurs 3.30 to 4.30.
fri 3.30 to 6.30.
sat 11 to 1.
okay, tt means i work like 12 hours a week. rahhh.
bad news is tt i may hv to tutor my cousin chinese;
for free.
lol.
okay lah, i cant teach him much for chinese so tt's fine.
but his mom might wan me to teach him amath.
aiya, but not confirm.
so see first bah.

YAY.
tml's the day!
haha, the day i get my first pay ^.^
isnt a lot, not even 100bucks =.="
but... tt's a beginning for me!
=))
yay!
im beginning to like my p3 student.
i hope his bro can behave much better so t i can like him too!
>.<
rahhh.
i cant believe kids these days =.=
alright, vday's coming...! =))

i waited. and waited. tried to entertain myself while waiting. finally i persuaded myself to go to slp. assuring myself that i will see ur msg whn i wake up. it was a terrible night. i awoke every now n then. den persuaded myself to go back to slp. finally it was day break n i checked my phone. nothing. forced myself to slp again. 7.30am. then 7.50am. 7.55am, hmm, doesnt hurt to call u 5 mins earlier eh? voicemail. 8am. voicemail. 8.05am, voicemail. rahh, go back to slp. slp u will forget everything. so i slept. 10.27am. i got up. 10.30am i called again. YAY! ringing tone. rejected. kae, he msged to say he was in class. replied. n i stared at my phone n waited. seemed like forever. but yay! CSLBAAA^AAA! i could feel. i just knew. but i was afraid tt even though i felt this way, things can still happen. it happened once n it could happen again. but anw i seemed like an irritant as he didnt reply. finally 13.24 my phone rang =DD the next 36mins brought me comfort n relief =)))

today's tuition was not bad. hahaha, cute kid but too active. jumped around the place even though i tried to coax him to sit down n draw. hahaha, he dun like to listen. like to do things his way. so hopefully soon i can find a gd way to get him to listen to me. hohoho. rushed hme aft tuition to play wif baby xavier. yay! seeing him makes me happy. coz he's too cute, too irresistable. haha. everyday i look forward to seeing him, especially whn im sad. dunno y even whn im sad i see him den wun be so sad le. too cute bah. heex. lovely baby. now, waiting for his lessons to end.

i'll stand by u in times of rain.
u matter to me.

rahhh...
cant make up my mind if today's a good or bad day.
man, i think it's bad.
boo! wasnt it supposed to be good?!
it was it was it was!!!!!!

we went gold class for a once in a life time experience.
it started off pretty funny bcoz the person gave us tickets to the normal movie.
we were like "2pm show" and he was like "1.35pm?".
we were like "here's $56" and he was like "$15 please".
n we knew wad was wrong whn we saw the tickets.
hohoho.
it was a great experience n had the whole cinema to ourselves =)
we ordered food (since it was once in a lifetime!).
so u could say we spent quite alot today tt we didnt order drinks n ended up going to giant aft tt to drink free water from the water dispenser.
LOL.
i drank 3 cups n he refilled the empty bottle!
embarrassing X/
but very fun!
=DD every moment spent wif him is funfunfun!
n whn it's fun, time tends to pass quickly;
too quickly in fact.

sometimes i wonder why in life there has to be so many obstacles. u would probably say obstacles help to shape n mould us, make us a tougher person. but obstacles make me sad. they make me wan to give up in life. isnt life supposed to be happy? rahhh. sometimes i really hoped tt i could close my eyes, tell myself it's just a bad dream n awake from tt dream. but i noe i cant, bcoz too often than not, they are reality. facts that we have to accept, things that we have to face.
sometimes scenes tt i come arcoss give me happiness, some make me feel that i wan to be in such situations, while others lead me to think twice about being in the same situation. how ironic.
parents chose to bring their kids into this world n hence hv the responsibility to give them the best. i mean, tts how i feel n if i hv a kid nxt time, i will give him/her all tt i can. but some do not give their kids enough. by this i mean these kids dun get wad many other kids get. poor kids. while some do not respect their kids, others even intrude into their kids privacy. well, u may think that they hv the right to coz they r aftall the parent, but how would the kid feel? hv parents considered tt? n whn kids do wrong parents just scold n beat them, do u think it really helps. do u think it's entirely their fault that they made mistakes? no. never. parents shld share the blame.

rahhh, i dunno y i typed all these nonsense but it's been pretty long since i blogged this way. i probably kept things inside me too long.
too long.

i presumed u didnt wan to worry me by waiting till evening to tell me all tt has happened.. since these hv happened there's no running away. so i'll stand by u the whole way though there are certain things tt u'll hv to face alone. but always noe BLULnL. n i'll rmb CLMAAA^AAA.
i hope things will be fine for u soon.